Book Review: Instant Replay: The Green Bay Diary of Jerry Kramer
by Jerry Kramer / Edited by Dick Schaap

I bought this book for a dollar at the cheap bookstore in Springfield (you know, the one on Glenstone. Come on, people, work with me here; the name’s not important, the six for five dollars hardbacks in the very back are). As the football season geared up, I thought this would be a worthy read, and hey, it was. Packers partisanship aside, it’s a good book.

The book chronicles the 1967 football season from the point of view of the veteran guard. He kept notes and recorded his thoughts on tape every day from the training camp through the end of season. It reminded me a lot of Blue Fire: A Season Inside the St. Louis Blues which I read last year; however, the two differ in that instead of a sportswriter, the point of view is all player.

So in our daily capsules, we get inside the concerns of a 31 year-old football player, slightly afraid that he’s losing a step to the younger players. We’re coming fresh off of the Packers second consecutive NFL championship and their win in Super Bowl I. Kramer’s got lots of outside investments that he worries over, and he mentions from time to time what’s he’s reading during the season. But the book does focus on the Packers, playing with Lombardi and with the loss of Paul Hornung to the new New Orleans Saints expansion team.

As I mentioned, the book’s told in a diary style, with each day having its paragraphs or pages whether Kramer goes hunting or participates in the Ice Bowl. This makes it easy to read in short chunks, although the pace and voice really make it entertaining enough to read in larger doses.

Since the book chronicles an era before my birth, part of its charm lies in its details about a world I’d never know. Green Bay and Milwaukee described in the late 1960s and no mention of the War in Viet fucking Nam, man. Which differs, strangely, from the football season 2004, where the whole world’s talking about that war. One does get a point of contrast between some aspects of the game then and the game today–no agents, limited free agency, and so on. And on the field: well, let’s just give this some eighties kid perspective: the Jerry Kramer’s biggest concerns in the opponents he needs to block are Father Murphy, Webster’s adoptive father George Papadapolis, and Officer Moses Hightower. That’s just weird.

Buy My Books!
Buy John Donnelly's Gold Buy The Courtship of Barbara Holt Buy Coffee House Memories

Great Moments in Rhetoric

Jay “Not Eliot Spitzer (Yet)” Nixon, Missouri attorney general, speaking about his crackdown on the evil criminal geniuses scalping Cardinals tickets:

This may not be the crime of the century, but this may be the team of the century and, by gosh, people ought to have a right to see them.

Keep trying, though, and you’ll be just like Eliot Spitzer.

Who’s not an office holder in the state of Missouri. That’s one parallel I would enjoy, too.

Buy My Books!
Buy John Donnelly's Gold Buy The Courtship of Barbara Holt Buy Coffee House Memories

You Know Who I Feel Bad For?

Miikka Kiprusoff.

He had to stand in the St. Pete Times Forum with his mask up, waiting for the final handshake after the Tampa Bay Lightning beat his Calgary Flames in the Stanley Cup playoffs. Last night, he had to do the same thing in Toronto after Canada beat his country’s team in the World Cup last night.

Jeez, he’s going to apotheosize into a bonafied underdog.

(Yes, I did just coin the verb bonafy, which henceforth shall mean “become authentic.” Feel free to use it amongst yourselves.)

Buy My Books!
Buy John Donnelly's Gold Buy The Courtship of Barbara Holt Buy Coffee House Memories

Who Won The Olympics?

Who got the most medals at the Olympics? Why, the European Union, of course:

    EURO chief Romano Prodi last night hailed Britain’s haul of Olympic gold as a triumph — for the European Union.

    And he warned our athletes will have to fly the EU flag as well as the Union Jack at Beijing in 2008.

    That would mean 800m and 1500m champion Kelly Holmes and boxing sensation Amir Khan would be battling for Brussels as much as Britain.

    Mr Prodi turned the Athens games into a political football, boasting that our bag of 30 medals helped the EU trounce America and China.

Why stop there? Why not go all out and say:

The West defeated the East, the Islamic Crescent, and Africa!

It’s true. Check out these medal totals, which I gleaned from the official Olympic site:

Culture Country Gold Silver Bronze Country
Total
The West United States 35 39 29 103
  Russia 27 27 38 92
  Australia 17 16 16 49
  Germany 14 16 18 48
  France 11 9 13 33
  Italy 10 11 11 32
  Great Britain 9 9 12 30
  Cuba 9 7 11 27
  Ukraine 9 5 9 23
  Hungary 8 6 3 17
  Romania 8 5 6 19
  Greece 6 6 4 16
  Norway 5 0 1 6
  Netherlands 4 9 9 22
  Brazil 4 3 3 10
  Sweden 4 1 2 7
  Spain 3 11 5 19
  Canada 3 6 3 12
  Turkey 3 3 4 10
  Poland 3 2 5 10
  New Zealand 3 2 0 5
  Belarus 2 6 7 15
  Austria 2 4 1 7
  Slovakia 2 2 2 6
  Georgia 2 2 0 4
  Bulgaria 2 1 9 12
  Jamaica 2 1 2 5
  Denmark 2 0 6 8
  Argentina 2 0 4 6
  Chile 2 0 1 3
  Czech Republic 1 3 4 8
  South Africa 1 3 2 6
  Croatia 1 2 2 5
  Lithuania 1 2 0 3
  Switzerland 1 1 3 5
  Belgium 1 0 2 3
  Bahamas 1 0 1 2
  Israel 1 0 1 2
  Dominican Rep 1 0 0 1
  Ireland 1 0 0 1
  Latvia 0 4 0 4
  Mexico 0 3 1 4
  Portugal 0 2 1 3
  Finland 0 2 0 2
  Serbia/Montenegro 0 2 0 2
  Slovenia 0 1 3 4
  Estonia 0 1 2 3
  Paraguay 0 1 0 1
  Venezuela 0 0 2 2
  Colombia 0 0 1 1
  Trinidad/Tobago 0 0 1 1
  Totals 223 236 260 719
 
The East China 32 17 14 63
  Japan 16 9 12 37
  Korea 9 12 9 30
  Chinese Taipei 2 2 1 5
  DPR Korea 0 4 1 5
  Hong Kong 0 1 0 1
  India 0 1 0 1
  Mongolia 0 0 1 1
  Thailand 3 1 4 8
  Totals 62 47 42 151
Islam Kazakhstan 1 4 3 8
  Egypt 1 1 3 5
  Azerbaijan 1 0 4 5
  U Arab Emirates 1 0 0 1
  Indonesia 1 1 2 4
  I. R. Iran 2 2 2 6
  Syrian Arab Rep 0 0 1 1
  Uzbekistan 2 1 2 5
  Totals 9 9 17 35
 
Africa Eritrea 0 0 1 1
  Cameroon 1 0 0 1
  Zimbabwe 1 1 1 3
  Kenya 1 4 2 7
  Ethiopia 2 3 2 7
  Morocco 2 1 0 3
  Nigeria 0 0 2 2
  Totals 7 9 8 24

Oh, yeah, we trounced those other cultures, ainna? The West! Birthplace of democracy, Enlightenment (nirvana notwithstanding), capitalism, and sports which require expensive equipment and training to excel.

What, Mr Prodi, you think it’s unsophisticated to extrapolate that far? Then shut your soon-to-be even-more-irrelevant yap and allow your Worthless Pact satellite countries to enjoy a bit of harmless nationalism on the fields of sport and recognize the Olympics for what they are: games.

Of course, as such, I suppose it’s only natural that a EUcrat would see the Olympics as nothing but a continuation of EU diplomacy by other means.

(Link seen originally on blogoSFERICS.)

Buy My Books!
Buy John Donnelly's Gold Buy The Courtship of Barbara Holt Buy Coffee House Memories

Mischaracterization

According to Jeff Gordon’s Tipsheet, Michael Vick said this in Maxim magazine (the interview’s not available online):

“Yeah, some people think blacks can’t make good QBs. It’s that Rush Limbaugh (stuff). But it doesn’t matter – black, white, or purple – all I wanted was a chance to prove them wrong.”

But that’s not what Rush said:

“I think what we’ve had here is a little social concern in the NFL. The media has been very desirous that a black quarterback do well,” Limbaugh said. “There is a little hope invested in McNabb, and he got a lot of credit for the performance of this team that he didn’t deserve. The defense carried this team.”

Let’s break it down. Limbaugh said:

  1. The media wants black quarterbacks to do well.
  2. They hope McNabb will do well, so they gave him more credit than he deserves.
  3. The Philadelphia Eagles defense contributes more to the team’s success than McNabb.

Rush Limbaugh did not say that blacks cannot make good quarterbacks. But since he’s Rush Limbaugh, other people can put whatever racist words they want into his mouth, and everyone should simply nod and cluck, I guess.

Buy My Books!
Buy John Donnelly's Gold Buy The Courtship of Barbara Holt Buy Coffee House Memories

Post-Dispatch Math

That’s some mighty smart figurin’:

Brett Hull, third on the NHL’s career goals list, signed a two-year contract with the Phoenix Coyotes on Friday.

Financial terms of the deal were not disclosed.

The free agent forward, an 18-year veteran who starred for the Blues and spent the last three seasons with Detroit, has 741 goals — second only to Coyotes managing partner Wayne Gretzky’s 894 and Gordie Howe’s 801.

Buy My Books!
Buy John Donnelly's Gold Buy The Courtship of Barbara Holt Buy Coffee House Memories

Dispatch from the Sports Wars

Speaking of a ballot initiative to prevent sale of the naming rights to Candlestick Park, a San Francisco 49ers offers this level-headed and non-hyperbolic assessment:

“I think putting this on the ballot has catastrophic consequences for the future of Candlestick Park and the future of professional sports in San Francisco,” said 49ers spokesman Sam Singer.

Perhaps he needs a reminder of what a catastrophe is.

But should one even hope for better from a spokesman for a team with gold-digging right in the name?

Buy My Books!
Buy John Donnelly's Gold Buy The Courtship of Barbara Holt Buy Coffee House Memories

LeMond….Le Monde….Coincidence?

Poor form, old boy, criticizing a countryman in a foreign paper:

The French newspaper Le Monde, which has previously leveled doping accusations at Armstrong, on Thursday ran an interview with three-time Tour winner Greg LeMond, who suggested he doubts his fellow American is drug free.

“Lance is ready to do anything to keep his secret,” LeMond was quoted as saying. “I don’t know how he can continue to convince everybody of his innocence.”

I don’t know if Lance is mainlining schucking Cheetah urine, but I can smell some amount of pungent envy trickling down someone’s leg, Greg.

Buy My Books!
Buy John Donnelly's Gold Buy The Courtship of Barbara Holt Buy Coffee House Memories

Hockey Nugget

Just say no Hasek:

Hasek said other teams — believed to be the New York Rangers, St. Louis Blues and Vancouver Canucks — are also involved in negotiations.

The St. Louis Blues do not need another breaking-down, past-his-prime goalie or another questionable goalie who won a Stanley Cup with a better team. They need to bring up Curtis Sanford and let him be the man.

Not that the NHL matters. Talking hockey is as meaningful as talking about the weather until the lockout ends, or St. Louis gets a WHA team. Whichever comes first.

Buy My Books!
Buy John Donnelly's Gold Buy The Courtship of Barbara Holt Buy Coffee House Memories

Hockey Heaven

  • Tampa Bay Lightning win Stanley Cup. In a hard fought, nail-biting series, Khabibulin proves the better goalie over Miikka Kiprusoff. Story
  • Brian Noggle wins Great Hockey Pool 2004. It’s a little pool run by a former co-worker. Since I picked Tampa Bay to win the cup, with their victory I edged out some late competition. It’s my second win in two years, marking the beginning of a dynasty. Of course, I’ve gotten much better at it now that we’re not playing for real money.
  • Milwaukee Admirals sweep Wilkes-Barre / Scranton to win the American Hockey League’s Calder Cup. Ah, my hometown team, the first hockey team that I ever saw play a game. Led by a lifetime minor-league goaltender, the Admirals hoist their first championship cup, bringing honor to my hometown and all 40 hockey fans in Milwaukee. Story

Regular blogging should resume tomorrow now that the Stanley Cup finals are over, and the NHL for that matter.

Buy My Books!
Buy John Donnelly's Gold Buy The Courtship of Barbara Holt Buy Coffee House Memories

Turning the Irony to the Wool Setting

Congratulations once again to the St. Louis Post-Dispatch. In today’s print edition, the story entitled Hosts of sports-talk shows should follow a few basics contains rule number one for radio sports talk show hosts:

Be as informed as your listeners: Hosts should know at least as much about current events as those who are on the other end of the radio. And it doesn’t take that much work.

Accompanying this piece is a photo of Tony Twist, who has recently been ousted from a hosting position on one of the radio stations discussed in the article. The caption for the photo?

Former Blues defenseman Tony Twist was a casualty of changes at radio station KSLG.

Here on the Internet, we have a saying: Double-check your spelling when you criticize someone’s grammar.

Note to the unhockey-savvy, including the sports photo caption writers for the Post-Dispatch:Tony Twist was a winger, a forward, not a defenseman.

Buy My Books!
Buy John Donnelly's Gold Buy The Courtship of Barbara Holt Buy Coffee House Memories

Hockey Joke

Four hockey fans are mountain climbing. Each climber happens to be a rabid fan of a different NHL team. One from Chicago, one from St. Louis, one from Detroit and the other from Nashville. As they climbed higher and higher, they argue more and more about which of them is the most loyal to their particular hockey team.

As they reach the summit, the climber from Chicago takes a running leap and throws himself off the mountain yelling ” This is for the Chicago Blackhawks!”

Not wanting to be outdone, the climber from Nashville throws himself off the mountain shouting “This is for the Nashville Predators!”

Seeing this, the St. Louis Blues fan walks to the edge and yells, “This is for hockey fans everywhere!”. He then pushes the fan from Detroit off the cliff.

(Slightly modified from a joke seen on Hockey Pundits, which involved some Canadian teams or something.)

Buy My Books!
Buy John Donnelly's Gold Buy The Courtship of Barbara Holt Buy Coffee House Memories