As some of you know, my esteemed spouse has become something of a fitness/nutrition, er, expert (I was going to say “nut” but Heather has educated me that nuts contain a lot of fat, and she does not, so “expert” it is).
Since she’s gotten into this “way of life” (insanity), we’ve started visiting the local Whole Foods Market, which sells wheat and fiber; wheat, tofu and fiber; wheat and soy; wheat, fiber and soy; wheat, fiber, tofu and soy; soy, fiber, tofu and soy; soy, wheat, soy, soy, fiber and soy; soy, tofu, soy, soy, soy, fiber, soy, tomato and soy; soy, soy, soy, wheat and soy; soy, soy, soy, soy, soy, soy, baked beans, soy, soy, soy and soy.
When we hit the antique food aisle (you know, expensive, authentic junk food), I found King Lager, a product of Australia, and certainly something of which our Australian friends cannot be too proud. Of course, I did not know that then, so I bought a six pack of it. I figured, of course, since it was in a health food store, it must be good for me.
I should have known you cannot brew granola.
Now, I have been known to enjoy some darker, heavier beers (Guinness Draught, London Porter, and some others), but this King Lager is like drinking wheat soup.
Sorry, guys, I have not slipped into the home brewing hell, so when the texture varies between sips, I have to wonder about the sanitary conditions of the brewery. Do the organic and natural designation cut-off point come before or after Louis Pasteur? Is that prime Australian hopps, or could it be wallaby tail?
On the bright side, my bones are stonger and I have a nice, shiny coat on my head (what remains).
Regardless, I am sticking to Guinness Draught. There are no snakes in Ireland!