News You Hopefully Cannot Use

From Hagakure: The Book of the Samurai:

If you cut a face lengthwise, urinate on it, and trample on it with straw sandals, it is said that the skin wil come off. This was heard bny the priest Gyojaku when he was in Kyoto. It is information to be treasured.

It is also information to be woven into your nightmares.