In Milwaukee News This Morning

This could be my cousin:

A man stopped for driving 99 mph in a 55-mph zone said he was speeding because he was late to a soccer game.

The 26-year-old man was stopped on I-94 southbound in Oak Creek by a sheriff’s deputy working the speed saturation patrol shortly after 8 p.m. Monday.

The math and the sport works out right. I’ll have to ask him.

Fedora-wearing man charged in armed robbery of West Allis jeweler:

A man in a suit and a fedora who robbed more than $200,000 worth of jewelry from a West Allis store later pawned the goods for money to buy heroin, according to a criminal complaint.

Why is it everyone hears about a guy in a fedora, and they automatically think of me? I bet this guy left the feather in.