Category: News

A new scientific experiment to determine the nature of hipsters:

Apple Computer Inc. may be cool and hip with consumers, but it’s anything but a trend-setter when it comes to good environmental policies, according to the activist group Greenpeace.

In its latest report on major electronics manufacturers, Greenpeace ranked Apple dead last on environmental issues because it still uses harmful chemicals in many of its products and because it does a poor job promoting recycling efforts for its iPods and other products.

If the hipster under study receives this news and changes to HP and Zune, he or she is genuinely concerned about the environment; if the hipster under study receives this news and continues with the Macs, iPods, and contributions to Greenpeace, the hipster only cares about appearances or his or her own creature comforts, with the money going to environmental causes as a sop to his or her own conscience. Or, I suppose, the person likes Apple stuff and thinks this is a cynical ploy by Greenpeace to increase donations by conscience-stricken materialist hipsters.

Aw, heck, I guess it could mean anything. I, Mr. Noggle, am a poor scientist. But that’s why I got an English degree.

Brazil Cancels Flights at 3 Big Airports:

Virtually all takeoffs from three major airports in Brazil were canceled Tuesday night after an air traffic communications system broke down, making it difficult for controllers to communicate with pilots and creating air travel chaos.

Hey, it’s [almost] Christmas!

Crass commercial use of the image of a religious icon? Let the riots begin!

Plastic charge-card consumerism and yoga-minded, organic-eating activism — they seem to clash.

But there they are, fused in new Visa credit cards bearing such images as a meditating Buddha and sunlit hands folded in prayer.

Oh, wait, I guess we hold some religions and their adherents to a higher standard.

From an e-mail to Instapundit regarding game systems:

I’m you’re [sic] typical colelge [sic] guy, but bringing it home for thanksgiving [sic], every member of my family played it and loved it.

Three grammatical errors in one sentence. Typical colelge guy, indeed. Sadly.

A man, robbed by a juvenile who snatched his cash as he turned away from an ATM, displays empathy worthy of an educational professional:

Gallagher laughed. “I’m a substitute teacher,” he said. “I deal with these little monsters on a daily basis.”

How come no districts have snatched him up as a full time teacher?

Kirkwood man charged with impersonating a Marine:

The FBI has arrested a Kirkwood man accused of impersonating a U.S. Marine and wearing a Navy Cross and other medals he did not earn.

Michael Gerald Weilbacher, 48, of the 200 block of Horseshoe Drive was arrested by FBI agents last night, the U.S. Attorney’s office said today.

So a guy puts on a uniform and goes to a ball to meet the chicks, and suddenly he’s in Leavenworth?

Pardon me for being a chickenhawk child of two Marines, brother to only one, but damn, doesn’t our federal law enforcement force (and its enabling Congress) have better priorities than to chase down false braggarts?

Well, our society has functionally eliminated shame as a deterrent/retributive factor (Michael Gerald Weilbacher, you’re a lying sissy), so some groups think its necessary to protect the sensitive feelings our former soldiers by incarcerating some nitwit.

Pardon me if I suspect that perhaps this stems from some symbolic gesture sop thrown to our veterans in place of actual, you know, respect for those who served.

Bodies of 3 family members found in Lemay home:

The bodies of three members of a Lemay family, missing since last week, have been found in the basement of their home, police sources said today.

Jeez, Louise, what, was it too spooky down there for the police to go down into the basement sometime last week after they shot dead the man who killed these people? This is Lemay, for crying out loud. If you stumble in the basement, you don’t fall flat on the floor.

UPDATE: This keeps getting more embarrassing for county cops; apparently, it was a family member who found the bodies.

Bookcase ‘trap’ killed US woman:

The body of a missing US woman has been found by her family, wedged upside down behind a bookcase in her room.

Mariesa Weber, 38, is believed to have fallen over and become trapped as she tried to reach behind the bookcase to adjust the plug for a TV set.

Thanks, Ace.

Headline: Honduras fines U.S. subsidiary over alleged mercenary training.

That’s odd, I didn’t realize that the United States of America had subsidiaries.

Oh, wait:

The Honduran government said Friday it has fined the local subsidiary of a U.S. company $25,000 for allegedly training more than 300 Hondurans and foreigners last year to work as mercenaries in Iraq.

Well, brevity is the soul of wit, headline writing, and negatively painting the big bad superpower inaccurately.

Reading the story, apparently the company was training people to work as security guards in Iraq, which means that I’ll have to start calling Rose, the desk guard at the building in which I work, a mercenary since that’s what the Honduran government would call her. But hey, free $25,000!

Recliner Saves Man Who Was Shot in Head:

Now comes another reason to stay put in the La-Z-Boy: A man sitting in his easy chair was shot in the head by his wife, but the sturdy recliner absorbed most of the bullet’s force and left him virtually unscathed.

The deep, plush padding will also offer excellent protection should the Earth stop spinning.

Yeah, I’ve had a lot of nothing to say lately. How could I, knowing that the killer bees coming is nothing compared to the unchecked northward march of the giant carnivorous centipedes?

Poll results that promote the point-of-view of the commissioning group as news? Sure, if the poll knocks America:

Rude immigration officials and visa delays keep millions of foreign visitors away from the United States, hurt the country’s already battered image, and cost the U.S. billions of dollars in lost revenue, according to an advocacy group formed to push for a better system.

To drive home the point, the Discover America Partnership released the result of a global survey on Monday which showed that international travelers see the United States as the world’s worst country in terms of getting a visa and, once you have it, making your way past rude immigration officials.

Unfriendly ain’t the worst that can happen to travellers to a foreign country, but it’s awfully important to the make-feel-nice industries.

UPDATE: Once again, someone else discovers that I am dumb as a stump:

– Musings from Brian J. Noggle, who misses the point. The poll isn’t news because it “knocks America,” it is news because how people around the world view America impacts America in a variety of very important ways.

Well, I didn’t review the actual survey because I was not so inclined to delve into the material; instead, I wanted to point out, in my glib minimalist way:

• The report is probably getting more media play because it reflects badly on America, albeit in a trivial way. Of course, I’ve got nothing to prove this, which is the beauty of glib minimalism. I just have to assert and rage against the machine. Take it for what it’s worth, which is not much, but hey, it’s a free site.
• “Unfriendliness” in government officials is a relatively minor inconvenience compared to running into the religious police, getting shot during a civil uprising, or getting thrown in a foreign jail. But everyone has different priorities, I guess.
• Regardless of its methodology, the survey’s findings are trivial and ultimately unimportant. After all, it’s measuring perceived unfriendliness of immigration officials. They’re government bureaucrats. Ask anyone about any government official and you’re likely to come up with an unfavorable reading on the old tricorder.
• Finally, that a group of tourist-oriented companies would band together and find that tourism could be made better through some action of the government on their behalf is hardly shocking.

Still, I missed the point, which is changes to our immigration and visa policy to suit the needs of the study producers is good. No, I got that. Simple changes would benefit you. I got it.

But let’s look at the study’s other details (summary PDF) which can be spun otherwise than “U.S. is most unfriendly country to visitors.”

For example, once you get past the unfriendly, apparently they’re not afraid of the things that frighten Americans:

Immigration officials far outpace the threat of crime or terrorism as something international travelers worry about when considering coming to the US.

In spite of the raging unfriendliness, the visitors like the United States:

• 63% of travelers feel more favorable towards the U.S. as a result of their visit.
• 61% agree that, once a person visits the U.S., they become friendlier towards the country and its policies.
• 72% report that once they get past government officials at the airport, the U.S. travel experience is “great.”
• Nearly 9 in 10 travelers tell their friends, relatives about their travel experiences most or all of the time.

And:

• In every travel category but the point of entry experience, America ranks in the top three: travelers want to come to the U.S.
• Travelers are willing to wait an average of 46.5 days to get a visa to visit the U.S.
• More than 7 out of 10 travelers say that U.S. policies in the world would not stop them from visiting the U.S.

Yeah, it sounds a hell of a lot like the tourist street is rising up at our unfriendliness.

Meanwhile, since I am feeling minimalistly glib, allow me to mock some of the survey itself (survey results PDF).

For starters, 100% of the survey respondents had travelled off of their continent in the preceding year and a half, so we’re not talking about first time travellers. 65% are college graduates, compared to a thumbnail where college graduation rates by country top out at 40% (gathered here). The survey was taken on the Internet (or so I assume based on this question: “What regions have you traveled to? Just click on a region to indicate you have traveled there in the past 18 months.”

So the survey looks at well-travelled, well-educated, well-connected people. The sort who might easily look down on stupid foreign government officials, maybe. But that’s only what I assume based on my firsthand knowledge with frequent travellers abroad. Maybe I need to hang out with more down-to-earth jetsetters.

Now, here is our respondents’ breakdown by country:

What is your country of citizenship—that is, what country are you a citizen of?

United Kingdom	10
China	8
Russia	8
Venezuela	7
Brazil	7
Japan	6
Argentina	6
Korea	6
India	6
France	6
Germany	6
Australia	6
Colombia	6
Italy	5
Turkey	5
United Arab Emirates	–
Other	4
Refused/not sure	–

Now, let’s look at the questions:

Which ONE location on the map indicated BEST meets the requirement?
Offers good value for the money/Has convenient air service from [respondent’s country] and reasonable travel time

Let’s look again at that list, broken out differently:

Respondents from Europe	35
Respondents from Asia/Australia	35
Respondents from South America	26

To put that in perspective:

Respondents from a different hemisphere

96 (minimum)

So tell me again how any of the responses about the US being a good value or being reachable in a “reasonable” amount of travel time might be hampered by the fact that we’re a large ocean, a small ocean, or a pretty good sea away from the respondents? What, aren’t the Canadians, the Mexicans, and the Caribbean people not worthy of an opinion?

I mean, heck’s pecs, I think Illinois is a heckuva bargain for the travel dollar and is very convenient for travelling to. Because I can freaking walk there.

But I am belaboring my point when I could berecreate some other point which probably won’t be blogged.

So let me make sure I am missing the point completely, because I rather hate to nick the point, or rather to merely backboard-rim the point instead of a complete air ball:

A study commissioned by a group representing the tourism industry (neverminding projections that international travel to the United States will grow this year by 5.5% (source) has discovered that a number of well-travelled, well-educated, Internet-survey-taking foreign travellers think that U.S. immigration and customs officials are rude, and Reuters ran the story because of its ability to cast ill on America.

Because frankly, that is my point.

Regardless of whether the travel procedures are onerous, which I have no doubt they are, the proper way to encourage a meaningful reflection on the process is not to shout from the rooftops FOREIGNERS SAY AMERICA IS UNFRIENDLY, but particularly if you’re trying to sell a solution to Americans.

Instead, perhaps an appeal to the generosity of Americans who want to share the experience of this beautiful nation and its myriad landscapes and culturescapes with other people who obviously view America favorably.

Oh, but no, I miss the point of a public policy initiative coming from a trade group based in Washington, D.C., who thinks the best mechanism to initiate American public policy reflection is the reproach of foreign opinion. Because I am a dumb, ugly, and unfriendly American, no doubt.

You know why the Bush administration has chosen to provide a ludicrously self-confident front on its approach to the war on terror, when any reasonable person recognizes mistakes and setbacks that the president and his team seem loath to admit?

Because any crack in the unity plays like this: White House scrambles for exit strategy:

A “stay-the-course” U.S. policy in Iraq has suddenly veered toward a “change-the-course” posture, but with little certainty about what it will be changed to.

After three years of repeated insistences by President George W. Bush that he would accept nothing short of victory in Iraq and that the proper policy was in place to achieve that end, everything appears up in the air amid an intense flurry of new studies and proposals about the war.

Which of the recommendations the White House will adopt is unclear, but rising public anger over the war reflected in the congressional elections has most observers believing the administration has little choice but to shift gears.

“They’re looking for a way out,” Rep. Ike Skelton, D-Mo., said of the administration.

To its opponents in the other party and to the press, any reflection or re-evaluation is weakness.

Were this a less-than-family blog, I would express through creative invective my immediate, visceral reactions to this article, laden with a vocabulary designed to present through a funhouse mirror any thought of change into a desire to cut-and-run, hypocritically, from a fight we can win.

Personally, I regret that I have but one subscription to cancel to the St. Louis Post-Dispatch and that I did that long ago.

Schools look for ways to dispose of radioactive materials:

School labs have used low-level radioactive materials safely for decades; experts say they’re critical in teaching physics and chemistry. Sealed samples — often leftovers from past experiments — frequently are saved in closets and storerooms.

But as teachers retire and containers get shoved aside to make way for new samples, it’s easy for schools to lose track of what they’ve got, or to store them incorrectly, said Dr. Sandra West, an associate biology professor at Southwest Texas State University in San Marcos.

No doubt this story has put our high schools at risk, once Al-Qaeda gets finished ransacking antiques stores for lumeniscient clock faces, dumps for old smoke detectors, and garage sales for twenty year old microwave ovens.

State Senate passes $7.50 hourly rate:

Amid warnings that it could cost jobs in border areas such as the Metro East, the Illinois Senate on Wednesday approved a $1 minimum wage increase that would keep the state’s pay scale above Missouri’s and ahead of a proposed federal increase.

Rate freeze plan clears committee:

A proposal meant to spare consumers from double-digit electricity rate hikes next year easily cleared an Illinois House committee Tuesday, but its prospects of becoming law are uncertain.

Now that the Illinois state government has helped raise costs and hold prices down, making businesses’ decisions easy by removing them, the only question the legislators are leaving to its entrepreneur class is: To what state should I move?

Stem cell injections fight muscular dystrophy in dogs:

Stem cell injections worked remarkably well at easing symptoms of muscular dystrophy in a group of golden retrievers, a result that experts call a significant step toward treating people.

Fortunately, with the passage of Amendment 2 in Missouri, our canines will have access to these treatments and our biotech companies will have access to the sweet, sweet taxpayer cash to solve dogs’ problems.

But note:

The study was published online Wednesday by the journal Nature. It used stem cells taken from the affected dogs or other dogs, rather than from embryos. For human use, the idea of using such “adult” stem cells from humans would avoid the controversial method of destroying human embryos to obtain stem cells.

So another lifesaving cure for an animal that doesn’t require embryonic stem cells? Good thing we spent so much time and government effort in embryonic stem cell research!