From The Brian J. Noggle Independent, Non-Partisan Institute For Ceaseless Government Expansion

Our new study indicates that, when intoxicated, 83.4% of Americans (MOE 3.2%) would accept someone else getting hit on the head and them (the Americans surveyed) receiving $1,000,000.

We conclude that government could have an important role in this and should buy the beer, get out its cartoon mallet, and start writing its cartoon checks.