I’m Steve Jobs, Bitch!

Apple issues battery program for iPhone: Replacements cost $79, $6.95 shipping, three business days:

The iPhone’s battery is apparently soldered on inside the device and cannot be swapped out by the owner like most other cell phones.

Apple spokeswoman Jennifer Hakes said Thursday the company posted the battery replacement details on its Web site last Friday after the product went on sale.

Users would have to submit their iPhone to Apple for battery service. The service will cost users $79, plus $6.95 for shipping, and will take three business days.

That’s rich. Kinda like their overlord, come to think of it.

Don’t people gather with pitchforks and torches and DoJ attorneys outside the walls of Castle Redmond for this sort of thing?

(More on Kim du Toit and Tamara K.)

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