Category: News

I am going to write to my Congressman, Todd Akin, and ask him to introduce a bill into Congress that sets a statute of limitation for pillage and other historical wrongs.

In addition to the newly-normal clamor for slave reparations (for an injustice done 140 years ago at the minimum in this country), it looks as though some people are suing Elizabeth Taylor over a painting that’s been in her family for two generations now, which is 41 years in absolute reckoning:

Descendants of Margarete Mauthner allege “View of the Asylum of Saint-Remy” was taken from the German woman during World War II, and are demanding that Taylor returns the painting, which appraisers said could fetch $10 million to $15 million at auction.

Taylor, whose father bought her the painting at a London auction in 1963, has filed a lawsuit seeking a pre-emptive court declaration that she is the rightful owner of the painting, which hangs in the living room of her Bel-Air estate.

After forty years, descendents are suing, which means that no one involved in the pillaging is available for testimony. I understand it’s fifteen million dollars in the balance, but give me a break. Undoubtedly, each dollar and possession that passes through my hands has some unethical heritage in its ancestry if one were to look deeply enough, and with enough imagination, but that does not give others the right to take it from me in the name of their wronged ancestors from millenia past.

From a story in today’s St. Louis Post-Dispatch:

A robber probably figured he found an easy target when he saw a blonde in spaghetti straps walking alone in a Westport Plaza parking lot early Thursday.

But he picked the wrong woman.

The purse he snatched was tucked under the arm of an off-duty St. Louis County police officer who wouldn’t let it go without a fight.

As Fark would say, jailarity ensues. Unfortunately, Fark has yet to coin the term broken-kneecaparity ensues.

UPDATE: From the “I Wish I Would Have Said That” Department, we offer Aaron of Free Will Blog’s take:

At least the Post-Dispatch didn’t run it with the headline “Jobless Man’s Kneecap Broken After Woman Is Mugged”.

Donald Sensing finds a new variation on the Nigerian scam: American soldiers need help absconding with Saddam’s loot.

A 911 transcript between dispatch and the caller:

The following is a partial transcript of that call. Items in bold appear to be the voice of the 911 dispatcher.

911 Office, Tammy.

Tammy, my ex-husband’s here with a gun. He’s in here. He’s got a gun.

He’s going to kill them, hurry.

He’s got my kids, quick.

What’s his name?

Parker Elliott.

(Quick, shallow breathing)

2005 Forrest Ridge Trail, Culleoka. We’ve got a male subject in the house with a weapon.

He just told my kids he’s going to kill them if I’m on the phone. He’s going to kill me.

I don’t need you to hang up. Has he been drinking?

He’s going to kill me. They’re in the hallway with him, and I’m hiding in the closet.

(First shot is heard)

I’m hiding in the closet. I’m coming out ’cause he’d not going to hurt my kids. The kids are with him.

Can they get out?

I want to make sure he doesn’t shoot my kids. The kids are with him.

They’re deterring him. Please, please, he’s going to kill them.

Has he been drinking?

He’s got to be.

How long has he been out of the residence?

(Labored, quick breathing)

The kids are telling him I’m not here. He said if I’m here, he’ll kill them.

He just shot the gun.

He hasn’t seen you yet?

He’s coming. He just shot the gun again. Please! Please!

What kind of a gun is it?

A handgun. He’s going to the front door.

(Dispatcher to other emergency personnel) He’s inside the house, shooting. He had two children and an ex-wife.

Oh, he hit one of them!

Stay in the closet. He doesn’t know you’re in the closet?

He can see the phone cord coming in. Oh! He hit one of them.

(Gunshots. Sound of girl screaming in the background)

They’ve got the gun. I think my kids have got my gun. I can’t believe I forgot to get it.

I think one of my children has the weapon. He’s shot five times. I’m hiding in the closet, and my kids are out there with him.

How old are the kids?

15 and 18.

(Gunshots and screaming)

He shot five more. Is that all of them?

Ma’am, I don’t know what kind of gun he has.

He hasn’t shot them yet. My kids are still OK.

(Labored breathing)

(Kids screaming)

He’s going to kill me.

(Screaming)

He’s coming to the closet! He’s coming to the closet! He’s coming to the closet!

(Kids screaming, shrieking)

He’s at the closet. He’s going to shoot me. Help me! He’s here. He’s gonna hit me with the gun.

(Children screaming in the background)

Calm down.

He’s still shooting at the kids! Help me!

(Whimpering)

Be calm! They’re getting there. They’re coming.

He’s beating on the doors.

(Loud banging)

He’s still shooting.

Parker, don’t!

Parker, no! Please, no!

He’s going to beat a hole in the door.

Ma’am, calm down. What’s your name?

Please! Freda! Freda!

(Yell heard from man in background)

Please, don’t hurt my kids! Don’t hurt my babies! Parker, no!

Where are they?

I don’t know.

(Screaming)

Parker, please! Don’t!

(Screams, screams, screams)

(Gunshots)

Don’t hurt my babies!!

(Shrieks)

(Screams)

Freda, what’s going on? Freda?

(Gunshots, gunshots)

Hello?

This is E-Com 720. We just heard two gunshots inside the residence. We heard a woman screaming. Now we’ve got dead silence.

10-4.

Sleep tight, and don’t worry; the almighty proper authorities will protect you. Or at least will fill out the paperwork after you’re gone.

(Link seen on Hobbs Online.)

Hillary Clinton says:

“Many of you are well enough off that … the tax cuts may have helped you,” Sen. Clinton said. “We’re saying that for America to get back on track, we’re probably going to cut that short and not give it to you. We’re going to take things away from you on behalf of the common good.”

I immediately thought to compare it to the campaign worker who visited James Lileks’ house:

Then came the Parable of the Stairs, of course. My tiresome, shopworn, oft-told tale, a piece of unsupportable meaningless anecdotal drivel about how I turned my tax cut into a nice staircase that replaced a crumbling eyesore, hired a few people and injected money far and wide – from the guys who demolished the old stairs, the guys who built the new one, the family firm that sold the stone, the other firm that rented the Bobcats, the entrepreneur who fabricated the railings in his garage, and the guy who did the landscaping. Also the company that sold him the plants. And the light fixtures. It’s called economic activity. What’s more, home improvements added to the value of this pile, which mean that my assessment would increase, bumping up my property taxes. To say nothing of the general beautification of the neighborhood. Next year, if my taxes didn’t shoot up, I had another project planned. Raise my taxes, and it won’t happen – I won’t hire anyone, and they won’t hire anyone, rent anything, buy anything. You see?

“Well, it’s a philosophical difference,” she sniffed. She had pegged me as a form of life last seen clilcking the leash off a dog at Abu Ghraib. “I think the money should have gone straight to those people instead of trickling down.” Those last two words were said with an edge.

“But then I wouldn’t have hired them,” I said. “I wouldn’t have new steps. And they wouldn’t have done anything to get the money.”

“Well, what did you do?” she snapped.

“What do you mean?”

“Why should the government have given you the money in the first place?”

“They didn’t give it to me. They just took less of my money.”

That was the last straw. Now she was angry. And the truth came out:

“Well, why is it your money? I think it should be their money.”

Of course, I saw the story on Drudge and made the connection independently, but before I could post it here, the all-knowing Instapundit commented on it, too.

Upon hearing the quote, my beautiful wife said, “Geez, Hillary, why don’t you just move to China?”

And my response: “Because, honey, she wouldn’t rule China.”

For a man of discriminating taste, Neil Steinberg sure can say some awfully st00pid things:

It reminds me why Democrats are always at a disadvantage when butting horns against the Republicans — Democrats think, and re-assess, and the notion of fairness at least floats somewhere in the background.

Got that, children? Republicans are inherently unfair and unreasonable. Democrats, on the other hand, are blinkered by the blinding light of their reason.

Someone tell me he’s joking.

Personal note to Aaron, of Free Will Blog: Ha, ha! Your governor sucks worse than my governor!

Jeff Jarvis characterizes tax cuts:

George Bush (following in the footsteps of Reaganomics) made a politically cynical tax cut when he came into office, cutting taxes but not cutting spending and instead borrowing so he could cut those taxes. He gave away money to voters, money he didn’t have. He borrowed money from our children to pay us to curry favor with us. That is political cynicism at its worst; it’s one of my big problems with Bush.[my emphasis]

Whereas the federal government, wherein the House of Representatives initiates all spending and tends to do so in large, unvetoable ominousbus bills, did in fact decide to cut taxes and keep spending, this does not represent giving money to voters. It represents confiscating less.

But then again, Jarvis is not a constitutional scholar or a political scientist. He’s a happening-man-about-the-country.

Of course, I am not any of the above; however, I am a tax payer, or rather, I am someone from whom taxes are taken in my bimonthly pay check.

Hey, Oprahzenry, E.J. Dionne mentions Barack Obama, the guy running for Senate who didn’t ask Seven of Nine to have sex in public (that we know of), and Dionne thinks this guy could be president.

Swell. Here’s Dionne’s ringing endorsement summary:

Obama is interested in people who are hurting and problems that are serious. That, even more than his biography, is why he’ll hit the big time.

We need a yet another president worried about hurting.

Personal note to Illinois voters: Please vote for Obama, elect him to the Senate, and make it near impossible for him to become president.

Irish outlaw Muslim second wives.

What can we infer from this headline?

• Muslims’ third through sixteenth wives are okay.
• Second wives are okay if they’re Methodist.

Pah, I got nothin.

Drudge links to a Yahoo! photo of Bill Clinton with the headline CLINTON SPORTS MYSTERY BRACELET….

Mystery? Come on, we’re on the Internet.

We know what the bracelets mean.

There, I have said it. Read his column today, entitled Terrorists take us to the real ring of hell (worth the registration required). Real meat:

Avoiding the Berg video, or the pictures of what happened to Johnson, or the images of the next American they grab, won’t dull the knives of those who want us all dead. They want to drive Americans from where we want to stand in the world and send us quivering home.

Avoiding won’t make us safer here, either. It actually may do us all a disservice, since it allows us to keep an emotional distance.

The flat of the killing knives is only an inch or two wide. It is much shorter than the distance between today and Sept. 11, 2001. We’ve achieved separation from each, and that is dangerous.

I don’t know why Kass isn’t a blogosphere superstar like Lileks, Appelbaum, or Steyn.

Does Cuba have enough land for an “all-out ground war“?

(Link seen on Fark.)

UN slams US over spending Iraq funds. It goes like this:

United Nations-mandated auditors have sharply criticised the US occupation authority for the way it has spent more than $11bn in Iraqi oil revenues and say they have faced “resistance” from coalition officials.

In an interim report, obtained by the Financial Times, KPMG says the Development Fund for Iraq, which is managed by the US-led Coalition Provisional Authority and channels oil revenue into reconstruction projects, is “open to fraudulent acts”.

Ha ha ha ha! Hooo. And then the UN says, “the CPA is open to fraudulent acts.” Ha ha ha ha haa!

Sorry, it’s hard to type with the tears from the laughter in my eyes. That Matt Drudge, who told me this one, is a stitch, ainna?