For Christmas, my oldest son received a gift card to a local sporting goods store along with a skateboard helmet, and at the end of last week, he actualized that gift card into a skateboard.
Which has led me to needing to announce the rules for the skateboard. Rules which I would have thought are akin to natural laws, that my pre-teen boys could reason or infer out of other rules that they have been told as well as the laws of physics they know.
Oh, but no.
I have had to promulgate:
- No riding the skateboard in the house.
- No skateboarding in the dark.
- No skateboarding in the rain.
- No skateboarding before 6:30 am.
- No skateboarding in the dark and rain before 6:30 am.
- No firing Nerf guns from on the skateboard.
- No shooting BBs at someone on a skateboard or bike. (I threw the latter in because it seemed like a good idea.)
- No skateboarding on ice.
- One person on the skateboard at a time.
- No riding the skateboard into the house or any part of it.
- No hitting another person with the skateboard.
And so on.
That’s why the call me Daddy Deutoronomy. Or they would if they’d thought of it.
