Book Report: The Way to Dusty Death by Alistair MacLean (1973)

This is my second Alistair MacLean of the year (the first, as you remember, was The Golden Gate in August. Both stem from the 1970s, which based upon the evidence of these two texts might represent the phoning-it-in period for MacLean.

The book starts out with an race car crash in the European Grand Prix circuit. The reigning champion apparently has lost his nerve and become an alcoholic. However, he seems to have some hidden agenda, for while he’s putting on the show, he’s sneaking around and investigating something. MacLean doesn’t really draw us into his investigations or quickly identify the real meat of the story–Harrow has gone underground or underdog to find out who’s gambling on the races and fixing them by sabotauging cars while selling heroin.

The reader goes along mainly because it’s an Alistair MacLean book and something’s going to happen. It does, and then the book ends abruptly.

Not MacLean’s best effort, and not even as good as Floodgate, which draws the user into the plot if not the characters. The Way to Dusty Death does neither, really.

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Where Metaphors Fail

We talk about making sacrifices in our lives and our working world, using figures of speech such as taking one for the team or jumping on the grenade. Some say this makes our language richer, to use metaphors to express concepts in a colorful way. Hey, as an writer, I’m all in favor of it. However, when those colorful metaphors become cliches bantered about too easily, we forget the powerful sacrifice of those who do it literally:

A Navy SEAL sacrificed his life to save his comrades by throwing himself on top of a grenade Iraqi insurgents tossed into their sniper hideout, fellow members of the elite force said.

Petty Officer 2nd Class Michael A. Monsoor had been near the only door to the rooftop structure Sept. 29 when the grenade hit him in the chest and bounced to the floor, said four SEALs who spoke to The Associated Press this week on condition of anonymity because their work requires their identities to remain secret.

“He never took his eye off the grenade, his only movement was down toward it,” said a 28-year-old lieutenant who sustained shrapnel wounds to both legs that day. “He undoubtedly saved mine and the other SEALs’ lives, and we owe him.”

I don’t expect I could or would do that.

(Link seen on Outside the Beltway.)

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Author Coming to Town

The Programs Coordinator for the St. Louis [City] Public Library has informed me that Daniel Woodrell, the author upon whose works I commented in August, is coming to town:

The St. Louis Public Library and Big Sleep Books are pleased to host author Daniel Woodrell. He will discuss and sign his new book, Winter’s Bone, November 15 at 7pm at the Schlafly Branch Library, 225 N. Euclid Ave. Books for sale will be provided by Big Sleep Books. This event is free and open to the public. For more information, call 314-206-6779.

Winter’s Bone follows a 16-year-old heroine named Ree as she hunts for her drug-dealing father, while trying to keep her family intact. The book, set in Missouri’s Ozarks region, is earning comparisons to True Grit.

Daniel Woodrell lives in the Missouri Ozarks. Winter’s Bone is his eighth novel and has just been selected as the 2007 ReadMOre book.

Well, there you go; or there you might go, but I’ll probably skip it.

In a side note, the Programs Coordinator represents the third person with whom I went to high school to contact me out of the blue this week. Weird.

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Book Report: Kings and Queens of England and Great Britain by Eric R. Delderfield (1975)

As you know, gentle reader, I am something of an Anglophile as long as it doesn’t require actually traveling to Britain or liking, really, anyone or anything currently British. I was an English major, though, and as much as I tilted the degree toward American writers, I couldn’t escape the constraints of my collegiate upbringing. Plus, I think it’s interesting the progression of the English monarches throughout much of the relevant history of the Western world.

Consider this book to be a more detailed version than Britain’s Kings and Queens: 63 Reigns in 1100 Years, which I reviewed three years ago. That pamphlet, from the same time period as the edition of this book that I read, summed up the leaders and the effects their rules had upon England and Europe at large; this book, though, offers more verbosity in the leaders’ lifetimes and occasional sections into the time periods. Of course, this book is worth more than the pamphlet I reviewed in 2003, but it’s an expansion on the themes and rules therein.

Both books I’ve reviewed come from the early 1970s, so there’s not been much change in the lineage aside from the marriage of Charles III (projected) and the divorce of Charles III (projected) and his issue. Still, in the 1970s, the chroniclers had a certain (as sports fans now call it) homer sentiment; that is, the introduction of this book admits that the early rulers were barbaric, but the early times were barbaric, but that the home team (Britain) eventually turned out okay and that its influence on the world was good. As an American conservative, I respect that (and apply it to my own country).

This edition (ca 1975) offered me enough trivia and Britainnia to be worthwhile; I cannot speak to the late editions, but I don’t think they’ll be any less interesting.

On a side note, I’ll let you know, gentle reader, that I was a little ashamed of recovering the same territory that I mentioned in my review of the Bellews book. Until such time as I discovered when I covered that book, that is. I thought I’d read that book this year, or perhaps late last year. When the beauty that is this blog revealed that I read that earlier pamphlet 3 years ago, I was stunned. What a different world that was, for me at least. What were you doing then, and was it as immediate for you as the 9th century was for me?

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The Untold Story

Lost emu raises ruckus on Route 3:

Six times during the weekend, police here responded to the same call: a 100-pound emu running wild near Illinois Route 3.

The 5-foot-tall bird caused quite a ruckus, especially when it wandered into traffic on the busy highway, Police Chief Richard Miller said.

Sure, when it was apprehended, the emu told the cops it was lost, but the word I heard on the street is that this particular emu was looking to hitchhike to Carbondale to settle a score.

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Hijinks Not A Felony, If You’re The Police Chief’s Son

In St. Charles, Missouri, two youths in an unmarked police unit pull over an off-duty police officer, who recognizes the youths as not really cops. The leader youth is charged with misdemeanor impersonating a police officer instead of the felony tampering or, you know, stealing a freaking police car.

The city of Ballwin, whose police car was misappropriated, chooses not to press charges:

Banas said City Administrator Robert Kuntz had faxed a letter stating the following: “With regard to the case involving Brian Biederman and the use of his father’s police vehicle, the city of Ballwin is not desirous of prosecution in this matter. Please find enclosed a notorized form of no prosecution from the city of Ballwin.”

No doubt Ballwiin treats all youths, regardless of whether they’re the fruit of the Police Chief’s loins, with that amount of tolerance.

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Is There Anything Jail Cannot Solve?

Walk a dog without something to clean up after it? Go to jail in St. Charles:

Like many municipalities, St. Charles for years has had a pooper-scooper law requiring pet owners to remove their animal’s droppings while in public places.

However, Councilman Jerry Reese says the new measure, which he got the council to pass last week, will make it easier for police and animal control officers to deal with the problem. No longer will a witness to the droppings be needed to make a case, he said.

From now on, the ordinance books also will say that simply walking a pet without “waste removal equipment” in itself is a violation. Those convicted could be fined up to $500 or get up to three months in jail. The measure will take effect when Mayor Patti York signs it; she says she’ll do that sometime this week.

Now the government wants to micromanage the minutiae like a subdivision association with SWAT teams standing by. Why don’t we just get body armor and automatics for the building inspectors and get it done with?

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Newcomer Agitates In Favor Of Train Crossing Fatalities

No, he’s against train whistles:

Train horns are keeping Wentzville newcomer David Lutes up at night.

“It was a great disappointment to move to Wentzville and hear so much noise at night,” Lutes, 54, said. “On about the second night here, it was like (a train) was in our bedrooms.”

Lutes said he left Southern California for the clean air and convenience of Wentzville. He and his family absolutely love their new city — except for the nightly noise from train horns.

A Wentzville resident for just about a month, Lutes has already established a community action group, Wentzville Against Noisy Traffic and Trains. He’s looking for others wanting more sleep and less noise at night to write aldermen and sign a petition urging the city to apply for a quiet zone with the Federal Railroad Administration.

I’d remind the fellow that train whistles are safety devices designed to prevent collisions with the train. But I expect the gentleman doesn’t care as long as he gets his night’s sleep.

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Book Report: Unsolved Mysteries of the Past by Reader’s Digest Books (1991)

This book is part of the Quest for the Unknown set, and I guess its schtick is that it’s supposed to center around the past. It does have chapters on ley lines, old temples and sacred places, and whatnot, but it also lumps in lesser past things like mediums and some recent disappearances. It’s not exhaustive nor even detailed in the subjects it covers, preferring a very browsable format with small articles and lots of photographs and sidebars.

Still, if you’re jonesing for a Reader’s Digest compendium of paranormal and other things that make you go hmmmm, you’re better off with Mysteries of the Unexplained, which relies more on copy, is longer, and includes source notes.

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The Government Organism Learns

About twenty-five years ago, stoplights with crosswalks had two signals specifically for pedestrians. These signals were a red DONT WALK [sic] which displayed solid when the light was read, indicating that the pedestrian should not cross the street and a green WALK that indicated the pedestrian could enter the intersection and probably make it across before the light turned red and cross traffic ground the pedestrian to lunch meat. A third state, akin to the yellow light, involved the DONT WALK symbol flashing, which meant that the light was going to change soon and you probably shouldn’t enter the intersection.

This system, imperfect as though it was, lasted decades. However, some bureaucrat wanted to do something to improve it since people were still dying occasionally in the streets.

So in the 1980s, the conversion from the DONT WALK and WALK paradigm began its shift to the current iconography. The hand replaced DONT WALK and a person walking right to left replaced WALK. This new system would save untold children, the illiterate, and the non-English speaking people who couldn’t understand the DONT WALK and WALK on the signs and who couldn’t puzzle out that crossing with the red light was inherently bad and crossing with the green light was probably safe.

No, our governments enacted expensive changes which required replacement of all crosswalk lights and retraining the young, yet-unnamed Generation X to the new system. To protect the children, the illiterate, and the non-English speaking, you see.

I guess this system isn’t working, either, and that the new iconography doesn’t immediately, universally connect with people and tell them what to do. So now, to protect children, the illiterate, and the non-English speaking who couldn’t handle the old DONT WALK/WALK system–or perhaps adults who can read English but not symbols, the government has come up with this solution:


New crosswalk instructions

After 25 years in which, I assume, pedestrians have continued to occasionally die in crosswalks, the government has added an instruction manual for the new symbols which, apparently, dead pedestrians couldn’t understand. Now the children, illiterate, and non-English speakers get 21 English words explaining the symbols and what they mean. Because the children, illiterate, and non-English speakers couldn’t, apparently, understand 3 English words or 2 symbols without the combination thereof.

It makes me wonder what lesson the governments will learn about pedestrians even after this program does not completely eliminate pedestrian deaths. Perhaps that these instructions are not clear and they need more elaborate details? A manual for understanding the helpful signs at the crosswalks? The sky is the limit, since apparently common sense and budget never will be.

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Schrodinger’s Lotto Ticket

The lottery numbers have been drawn in a city far from here, and I do not know the results. With these tickets I hold in my hand, I am simultaneously a millionaire and myself, the superposition of states, and I will only become one or the other when I check the numbers.

Be that as it may, I’m refraining from clicking the Place Bid link on eBay until I make the observation.

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Book Report: An Alien Heat by Michael Moorcock (1972)

In stark contrast to the long, well thought out and meticulous Gor books I’ve been reading, here’s a short (140ish) paged book that’s the start of a trilogy. Set in the far future in a Utopia where man can bend matter and time to his whims, an indulgent and decadent playboy decides he’s going to court a recent arrival from 19th century England. As he tries to woo her with poorly-remembered and rendered gifts and all the luxuries the id can provide, she tries, as a Christian, to teach him virtue.

Then he goes back in time to retrieve her after one of his contemporary friends sends her back, and he meets his friend there as a judge who sentences him to death in 1896, but he’s spared and returned to the future for some purpose to be revealed in the next book. Good luck with that, protagonist. You’re on your own as far as I’m concerned.

Certainly, there’s some allegory in this remnant of 60s sensibility. I don’t think I’ll bother with it when I can pick up another Gor book instead. Perhaps I could spin some allegory of my own, where I generalize that certain segments of the population envisage a world of self-indulgence, lax moral standards, and whims catered to by forces whose details are so forgotten they might be magic, and that some segments of the population read books where evil exists and sometimes a man has to pick up a sword and chop at evil. But that’s too hasty a generalization for me, and besides that, no one cares thirty four years after these books might have met head-to-head for the soul of science fictiondom.

Man, who would have expected me to read another Moorcock two and a half years after I read The Black Corridor? Well, anyone who knows how books get off of my to-read shelves, I reckon.

And in closing, non sequitir, this is the 67th book I’ve read this year. Boo-ya!

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Those Generic Marauding Political Activists

The story in the St. Louis Post-Dispatch has a headline that describes the hooliganism at a political event: Madison County political fundraiser leads to brawl.

The lead describes some of the mayhem:

A brawl erupted hours after a political fundraiser ended for Madison County Treasurer Fred Bathon when his son punched a prominent funeral home director, police said.

Jacob Bathon punched Mike Weber, owner of Weber Funeral Home, several times in the face at Rusty’s in Edwardsville, said Police Chief David Bopp.

The fight was sparked by Weber’s refusal to place a political sign supporting Fred Bathon outside his business, sources said today.

Never mind, gentle reader, this is a generic young political activist. It could have happened to anyone, much like the political activist adult children who slash tires on election day.

But if you must know, gentle reader, the last line of the Post-Dispatch story identifies, for trivia’s sake:

Fred Bathon is seeking re-election as county treasurer. He is being opposed by Republican Kurt Prenzler.

All indirectly-like, see? The parent of this political activist is opposed by a Republican.

Could be a Libertarian.

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I Didn’t Sign That Paperwork

A friend e-mailed me from his new job, and I saw his signature block was doubtlessly a company recommendation:

CONFIDENTIALITY STATEMENT: This e-mail and any attachments are intended only for those to which it is addressed and may contain information which is privileged, confidential, and prohibited from disclosure and unauthorized use under applicable law. If you are not the intended recipient of this e-mail, you are hereby notified that any use, dissemination, or copying of this e-mail or the information herein is strictly prohibited by the sender. If you have received this transmission in error, please notify us immediately by replying to this message and deleting all copies from your system.

Dear unnamed company functionary, please note that my receipt and opening a message that came from your servers does not constitute a legally binding agreement on my part. Come and get me if you must, but please spare me the ill-informed bluster.

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