A Gift for One Day, Mortification for a Lifetime

How to mortify your beautiful wife into perpetuity in easy steps:

  1. Comment for a year that you’re thinking about getting a new suit since you haven’t owned one in fifteen years, since you got that one for $5 at a flea market but ruined it by getting grease all over the back of the jacket while helping prepare the hall for the wedding reception of your then beautiful girlfriend’s friends.
  2. Receive a gift card for a men’s clothier for your birthday.
  3. Pick out a tasteful suit, and by “pick out,” I mean let the salesman do it for you. For an extra charge, they will actually put animal tags in them for you.
  4. Match up the tigers on Sunday morning.
  5. Tell everyone that you came to church in your birthday suit.

This will never, ever get old.

To me.

Buy My Books!
Buy John Donnelly's Gold Buy The Courtship of Barbara Holt Buy Coffee House Memories