{"id":81,"date":"2003-07-08T10:18:00","date_gmt":"2003-07-08T10:18:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/brianjnoggle.com\/blog\/?p=81"},"modified":"2018-08-02T16:10:39","modified_gmt":"2018-08-02T21:10:39","slug":"81","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/brianjnoggle.com\/blog\/2003\/07\/08\/81\/","title":{"rendered":"Obsessive Compulsive Behavior Saves Marriage, $29.95"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>New technology offers bountiful rewards as <a href=\"http:\/\/www.arkon.com\/gadgets.html\" target=\"new\">Arkon TL 129 His &#8216;n Her Motion Activated Toilet Night Light<\/a> will automatically glow red if the toilet seat is up or green if the toilet seat is down, preventing those middle-of-the-night accidents that have caused many marriages to fail or combust in a blaze of murder\/suicide glory.  However, before this product became available, our marriage was guaranteed safe from this hazard by obsessive compulsive behavior.<\/p>\n<p>You see, we <i>always<\/i> put the toilet lid down in our bathroom to prevent a flush from spraying germs in festive patterns across the fixtures and paraphernalia in the bathroom and to establish a certain procedure for toilet usage.  You always lift the lid and\/or toilet seat and then replace it\/them when you&#8217;re finished.  By resetting the Toilet User Interface to a common starting point, we assure that it&#8217;s in a known state each time we want to use it.<\/p>\n<p>Our marriage is safe, and we&#8217;re not out $30 plus shipping and handling.<\/p>\n<p>Perhaps I should patent the business process of obsessive compulsive behaviors and then make a mint from people who <i><b>cannot help doing them<\/i><\/b>!  Sounds like a better retirement strategy than how my 401k plans have done the last few quarters.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>New technology offers bountiful rewards as Arkon TL 129 His &#8216;n Her Motion Activated Toilet Night Light will automatically glow red if the toilet seat is up or green if the toilet seat is down, preventing those middle-of-the-night accidents that have caused many marriages to fail or combust in a blaze of murder\/suicide glory. However, [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3334,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[16],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-81","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-life"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/brianjnoggle.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/81","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/brianjnoggle.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/brianjnoggle.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brianjnoggle.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3334"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brianjnoggle.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=81"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/brianjnoggle.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/81\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":21428,"href":"https:\/\/brianjnoggle.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/81\/revisions\/21428"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/brianjnoggle.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=81"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brianjnoggle.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=81"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brianjnoggle.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=81"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}