{"id":24444,"date":"2019-04-12T08:08:40","date_gmt":"2019-04-12T13:08:40","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/brianjnoggle.com\/blog\/?p=24444"},"modified":"2019-04-11T19:17:33","modified_gmt":"2019-04-12T00:17:33","slug":"the-macabre-mnemonics-of-nogglestead","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/brianjnoggle.com\/blog\/2019\/04\/12\/the-macabre-mnemonics-of-nogglestead\/","title":{"rendered":"The Macabre Mnemonics of Nogglestead"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>So, the other night, I was grilling chicken and pork at the same time, and I had separate tongs for each for sanitary reasons.<\/p>\n<p>The tongs were not the same size, but I could remember easily which was for which meat.<\/p>\n<p align=\"center\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/brianjnoggle.com\/bsgfx\/longpork.jpg\"><\/p>\n<p>The longer of the two was for the pork.  Because who can forget <em><a href=\"https:\/\/www.urbandictionary.com\/define.php?term=long%20pork\" target=\"_new\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">long pork<\/em><\/a>?<\/p>\n<p>I would have posted this on Facebook, but there&#8217;s this one guy that I used to work with that would always thumbs up every cannibal joke I made (like <a href=\"https:\/\/brianjnoggle.com\/blog\/2012\/06\/21\/a-rousing-anthem-extolling-cannibalism\/\" target=\"_new\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">this one seven years ago<\/a>, which I also posted on Facebook along with Donner party gags from time to time).  <em>Which was creepy.<\/em><\/p>\n<p>Probably as creepy as making cannibalism jokes, but I&#8217;m not that self-aware.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>So, the other night, I was grilling chicken and pork at the same time, and I had separate tongs for each for sanitary reasons. The tongs were not the same size, but I could remember easily which was for which meat. The longer of the two was for the pork. Because who can forget long [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3334,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[13],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-24444","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-humor"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/brianjnoggle.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/24444","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/brianjnoggle.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/brianjnoggle.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brianjnoggle.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3334"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brianjnoggle.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=24444"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/brianjnoggle.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/24444\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":24446,"href":"https:\/\/brianjnoggle.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/24444\/revisions\/24446"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/brianjnoggle.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=24444"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brianjnoggle.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=24444"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brianjnoggle.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=24444"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}