Government Critic Removed From Broadcast Television

Posted in News on May 18th, 2013 by Brian

KMOV anchorman Larry Conners posted on Facebook that he might have been targeted by the IRS for asking a tough question of President Obama during an interview before the election.

For posting on Facebook this sort of musing, his television station pulled him from the air and stifled him with a gag order:

Longtime KMOV (Channel 4) anchorman Larry Conners is “off the air” until further notice.

The station is examining Conners’ recent allegations that he was targeted by the Internal Revenue Service after interviewing President Barack Obama.

“He’s not suspended. We just all thought it made sense (for him) to take a few days off,” news director Sean McLaughlin said Thursday.

“We take this very seriously, and we don’t expect this to drag on. We’re still looking into the situation and weighing our options,” he said.

That’s the story from yesterday. On Monday, the inquisition moves forward:

A meeting between KMOV (Channel 4) executives and anchorman Larry Conners — who is off the air until further notice — has been set for Monday.

The station is examining Conners’ recent post to Facebook alleging he was targeted by the Internal Revenue Service after interviewing President Barack Obama.

Today, Conners’ attorney, Merle Silverstein, issued a statement saying Conners “is barred by corporate from making statements, posting on Facebook, or participating in interviews on the IRS issue.”

Silverstein’s statement concludes, “That is the only reason for his silence.”

The story is all full of the Sanctity of Unbiased Journalism:

Michael Valentine, a vice president with Belo Corp., KMOV’s parent company, told the news website BuzzFeed that Conners “owes a duty to our viewers to report in an unbiased manner.”

“His Facebook post and his Twitter posts, as a result, were inappropriate,” he said. “And we don’t condone personal posts that jeopardize the journalistic nature of our business. It’s really that simple.”

How cynical am I? Let’s peel back the layers of cynicism:

  • I wonder if Belo / KMOV minds if its on-air reporters speculate off-hand in an approved fashion, which might be pro-government. Because we’ve all seen how the papers and news stations have pretty much become lick-spittles for government at all levels, whether through multi-part and seemingly multi-annual booster sessions for additional government children’s programs (Springfield News-Leader, do you recognize anything about yourself here?) to promoting government largesse on sports facilities to approval of government incentives for redevelopers of downtowns or new developments of strip malls to strip sales from existing, full tax-freight paying businesses (unless, of course, the new development will have a Walmart, which is viewed with skepticism to say the least). Would he be on the air today if he’d mused that he thinks this is all blown out of proportion? Come on, cyn with me.
     
  • Is KMOV and its parent Belo afraid of what this now-viral musing of its anchor might mean to future access to the powerful or–dare we say it–corporate relations with the IRS?
     
  • Larry Conners has been on the air in St. Louis for a long time. Undoubtedly his salary is pretty good (from his perspective). Is it bad from KMOV’s persepective? Is Belo / KMOV looking to dump an anchor fondly enjoyed in the St. Louis area because he’s old and expensive, and they have seized upon this as a reason to do it, to make it Conners’ fault, and to seek the approval of the hipster/Washington Avenue loft demographic?

I guess we’ll know more on Monday, but regardless, this is a poor, poor reflection on KMOV and Belo.

An Excellent Illustration of the Importance of a Well-Armed Militia

Posted in News on May 6th, 2013 by Brian

In a column preceding Cinco de Mayo, local Springfield columnist Richard Thompson argues the importance of civilian gun ownership:

Cinco de Mayo celebrates a great Mexican military victory in the Battle of Puebla on May 5, 1862. On that date, 4,000 amateur Mexican soldiers armed primarily with old rifles and machetes defeated 6,000 heavily favored French troops, well trained and well armed. Indeed, at that time the French army was arguably the most formidable fighting force in the world. The last time France had lost a battle was at Waterloo, Belgium, in 1815. Napoleon I’s defeat there is enshrined in our language. “He’ll never win this one; he’s met his Waterloo.”

Of course, if you’re familiar with Mr. Thompson’s other columns, you’re recognize he is unlikely to mean to make that point. But he does.

But….American Eductation Is The Worst In The World!

Posted in Education, News on April 29th, 2013 by Brian

A pair of Russians who had lived in Japan for a number of years are willing to invest $500,000 to get US citizenship so their daughter can attend school in the United States:

That’s because the Russian immigrants came to the U.S. through the EB-5 visa program, a federal initiative that allows foreigners to earn a green card granting them permanent residency – and a path to citizenship – in return for investing at least $500,000 in an American business and creating at least 10 jobs.

For Anikeeva, she knew after spending her junior year of high school in Savannah, Ga., that she wanted to one day call America home.

The student’s return to the United States was not immediate or certain. She went home to Vladivostok, attended college, then spent seven years in Japan with her husband and daughter, helping run the family’s luxury automobile export business.

But as their daughter grew, Anikeeva and her husband decided they wanted her to have the advantages that come with an American education. And they were willing to pay to make it happen.

But…. but…. I thought people trotted out all kinds of statistics about how dumb American students are when it comes time to pony up other peoples’ money for teacher pensions?

But when it comes time for international-conscious people to decide where to raise their child to have the best opportunities, they come to the United States.

(Link seen on Hot Air.)

Tomorrow’s Swedish History

Posted in News on April 10th, 2013 by Brian

An important note on Swedish tomorrow’s Swedish history: Sweden and Belarus are enjoying a bit of rapprochement. Sweden sends diplomat to Belarus after teddy stunt:

The Swedish Foreign Ministry says it is sending a diplomat to Belarus after its ambassador was expelled last year following a Swedish advertising agency’s stunt air-drop of hundreds of teddy bears into the former Soviet state.

I’m glad to see Belarus is over the bear-bombing, but I still warn them: Do not sign a defensive pact with Sweden. Although she’s gone to war with Russia in the past, I really don’t see that happening again in the near future, unless it becomes Muslim-majority and Russia is one of the European hold-outs.

Ah, the imagination reels. As I like to say, All possibilities are possible, but not all probabilities are probable.

Tell Me Again How Making Claritin-D Prescription Only Will Keep It From Criminals

Posted in News on April 9th, 2013 by Brian

Union man jailed stole $800 in prescriptions from Walgreens, police say:

A Union man who allegedly took more than $800 in prescription drugs from one Walgreens store after attempting a similar heist from another store is in custody.

It’s just as likely he was after painkillers, but the criminals are gonna crimin, and hassling law-abiding citizens is a pathetic sham to make it look as though legislators are doing something.

It looks as Springfield is getting onboard with that, too.

Funny, when I moved down here, I thought it was a conservativish area, but you know what? Electoral politics is the same everywhere, and the crusading politician has achievements (often of dubious value) to claim come election time. So now your allergy medicine will be kept from you, and the city is expending tax dollars to help favored businesses, and they’re all eager to put siloed sales taxes on the ballot to dedicate money to the necessary functions of government so they don’t have to dedicate any of the bad idea slush fund to it.

It’s getting to be more like St. Louis all the time, but just a couple decades behind.

A Surprising Lead from the AP

Posted in News on April 1st, 2013 by Brian

High court poised to upend:

Has the world lived evolved past its history of traditional concepts of marriage and family and[sic] should the law become tolerant of alternate lifestyles?

Addressing two pivotal legal issues, … a divided Supreme Court is poised to answer those questions.

No, sorry, it’s not historic traditions and customs that evolved through millennia that should cause such soul-searching; I’m sure AP is all about dumping that without any thought higher than “HOMOPHOBE!” Instead, the pondering must occur to doubt whether the court should overturn legislation that is a couple of decades old.

Has the nation lived down its history of racism and should the law become colorblind?

Addressing two pivotal legal issues, one on affirmative action and a second on voting rights, a divided Supreme Court is poised to answer those questions.

Only in the latter case is anything to be “upended,” that is, turned over and thrown into disarray. In the former, it’s somehow different.

The Cat’s Paw

Posted in News on April 1st, 2013 by Brian

The Cat’s Paw:

The Monkey and the Cat (French title, Le Singe et le Chat) is best known as a fable adapted by Jean de La Fontaine that appeared in the second collection of his Fables Choisies in 1679 (book IX, No. 17). Although there is no evidence that the story existed before the 15th century, it began to appear in collections of Aesop’s Fables from the 17th century but is not included in the Perry Index. There are popular idioms derived from it in both English and French with the general meaning of being the dupe of another (e.g., a cat’s-paw). Usage of these and reference to the fable have been particularly employed in (although not limited to) political contexts.

In La Fontaine’s telling, Bertrand the monkey persuades Raton the cat to pull chestnuts from the embers amongst which they are roasting, promising him a share. As the cat scoops them from the fire one by one, burning his paw in the process, the monkey gobbles them up. They are disturbed by a maid entering and the cat gets nothing for its pains. It is from this fable that the French get their idiom Tirer les marrons du feu, meaning to act as someone’s dupe or, deriving from that, to benefit from the dirty work of others. It is also the source of the English idiom ‘a cat’s paw’, defined in the Merriam-Webster Dictionary as ‘one used by another as a tool’.

As North Korea continues on its course of heightened bluster and… well, I guess we’ll have to see if there’s an ultimate and that this is leading up to, many people are wondering when China will lean on its client state to keep them from going too far and triggering a war with South Korea and maybe the United States.

So I got to thinking: why would China not?

Maybe I’ve just been reading too much Swedish history recently and have its collection of abandoned defensive pacts in mind, but…. In a scenario coming from my wildly creative mind, North Korea invades South Korea, and the United States, led by a feckless leader who disdains allies of the United States, does not come to the aid of an ally bound by treaties. Or the military of the United States, diminished by defense cuts, does not prove adequate to the task of quickly saving its ally. Or a combination of these things.

If North Korea attacks South Korea and the response of the United States is tepid, what might China think about its prospects in an invasion of Taiwan and the United States reaction to that particular endeavor?

It costs China nothing in this scenario to let North Korea do what it would like and to see what the United States does.

Another thing I’ve taken to saying like it’s true around Nogglestead is that it’s entirely possible that World War III might take place in Asia, and the United States might only have a walk-on part.

Springfield To Vote On Whether To Grant Taxing Authority To Strip Mall

Posted in News, Springfield on March 13th, 2013 by Brian

Springfield shopping center eyes face-lift:

The owners of Country Club Center hope to give the aging shopping plaza a face-lift. If City Council approves plans for a Community Improvement District, future customers could help pay for the renovation.

CIDs elsewhere in the city have been used to help pay for infrastructure improvements at new developments or for ongoing maintenance and other services downtown and on Commercial Street. If approved, this would be the first time the special tax district has helped fund an entirely private project.

Once anchored on the north by Smillie’s grocery store, the shopping center at Glenstone Avenue and Bennett Street houses a variety of shops including Cosmic Fish and Springfield Leather Co.

Well, there it is, then. We’ve reached the ad absurdum of the special taxing districts. Here’s a property owner looking to levy taxes on customers of its customers to pay for improvements to a downwardly mobile strip mall that no longer houses a grocery store or an election year GOP HQ but does have a head shop, a tattoo parlor, a discount smoke shop, and a combination leather goods / bead shop.

In a capitalist system, the owner would fund the improvements and raise the rents on the current or future tenants. But in the hybrid-and-rapidly-becoming-solely-cronyist system we have, the owner gets to levy taxes on its tenants customers for the project. Or might very well. That is, through the use and abuse of these special districts, every strip mall in Springfield will have the same legitimate claim to raise sales taxes on customers who shop there. Why not? Jared got it.

Full disclosure: I have bought a strip of miscut leather at the Springfield Leather Company this year, so I would be on the hook for an extra penny every so often. So obviously I’m making this argument because it would impact me personally and not on principle.

A Few Seconds of Terror, A Lifetime of Stories and Obvious Puns

Posted in News on March 12th, 2013 by Brian

One in a hole:

The St. Louis Post-Dispatch reports that the mortgage broker from Creve Coeur, Mo., is recovering after a sinkhole opened up beneath him Friday on the fairway at the 14th hole of a southwestern Illinois golf course. The pit that swallowed him was 18 feet deep and 10 feet wide.

I can’t laugh. The sudden media spotlight on sinkholes reminds me that I live in a sinkhole area; a couple years ago, one opened up beneath a home in a neighboring community, and although no one was hurt, it was a nightmare for a couple who couldn’t live in the house, couldn’t sell it, and had trouble with the insurance company. Also, the neighbor whose property abuts the old Old Wire road beside my house has mentioned he has a sinkhole in his property just a couple dozen yards from my house.

I’m getting better about worrying about political outcomes with the perspective that suddenly the ground might swallow me up or that the planet has entered an undetected asteroid belt and extinction could occur at any time. So who cares about the political system collapsing in a couple years?

Message: Don’t Have The Baby

Posted in News on March 8th, 2013 by Brian

New York City’s government is promulgating a set of advertisements arguing against teen pregnancy:

HRA’s new Teen Pregnancy Prevention campaign shows the high costs teen pregnancy can have for both teen parents and their children. The campaign features ads with hard-hitting facts about the money and time costs of parenting, and the negative consequences of having a child before you are ready. The campaign will be on display on subways and bus shelters citywide, and will also feature an interactive texting program and a video.



I’m sorry, did I say against teen pregnancy?

These ads argue against becoming a teenaged parent.

That is a very different thing entirely.

(Story originally seen at Trog’s.)

Just Tell Her It Was Because Of Sequestration

Posted in News, Politicians on March 6th, 2013 by Brian

Senator McCaskill is upset:

Sen. Claire McCaskill is challenging a decision in the Air Force to release a colonel who had begun serving a prison sentence after being found guilty of sexually assaulting a woman in his home.

In a Senate Armed Services Committee hearing this morning, McCaskill grilled the head of the U.S. Central Command, Gen. James Mattis, about the conviction and release of Lt. Col. James Wilkerson, an F-16 pilot who had become an inspector general at a U.S. base in Italy.

“My heart is beating fast right now I am so upset about this,” McCaskill, D-Mo., said at the hearing.

Sen. Claire McCaskill is challenging a decision in the Air Force to release a colonel who had begun serving a prison sentence after being found guilty of sexually assaulting a woman in his home.

. . . .

The Air Force Times reported on Monday that a jury of four colonels and a lieutenant colonel had sentenced Wilkerson to a year in prison and dismissal from the Air Force after finding him guilty of sexually assaulting an American physician’s assistant.

But the conviction was reversed last week by Third Air Force Commander Lt. Gen. Craig Franklin after he concluded that there had been insufficient evidence.

McCaskill was strangely silent on the Department of Homeland Security’s recent release of thousands.

But then again, McCaskill grandstands as a watchdog of the military, not a watchdog of administrations controlled by her political party.

More Likely To Generate Revenue Than A Line Of Clothing

Posted in News on February 23rd, 2013 by Brian

The United States Postal Service certainly is diversifying its revenue stream. For starters, it’s turning to a line of clothing to help close the revenue shortfall caused by the decline of first class mail.

But it’s also looking to stick its hypostome into the recently unpersoned Lance Armstrong:

The United States accused cyclist Lance Armstrong on Friday of defrauding the U.S. Postal Service by taking its sponsorship money at the same time he was doping and using performance-enhancing drugs in violation of cycling rules.

The government joined a civil suit against Armstrong, stripped of his seven Tour de France titles and banned for life from cycling in 2012 after accusations he had cheated for years. In January, he said the accusations were true in an interview with television host Oprah Winfrey.

They got positive publicity when Lance Armstrong was a hero, and nobody thought ill of the post office for Lance’s recent fall from grace.

Until, of course, it decided to join this suit, where it revealed that the money-losing enterprise has $30 million or more to spend on sports sponsorships, and that it’s not above spending more of its lost money on a speculative lawsuit.

Gun Banning and Do Not Call Lists

Posted in News on January 21st, 2013 by Brian

So I got a phone call yesterday from a recording offering me…. I dunno. I get to the point where the recording says “Don’t hang up” or the sound of the ship’s horn or the ALERT that “The FBI….”

As I said, we get those daily even though 1) We’re on the no-call list and 2) Calling people on the no-call list is illegal.

Sure, when state governments got the company behind Rachel from Account Services, that stopped them for a little while and that particular flavor of illegal call has stopped, but other companies continue to ply the illegal trade.

Kind of like gun restrictions, hey?

People who follow the law follow the law, and people who do not do not. And making the people who follow the law follow more laws does not make the people who do not start to follow the law.

That’s QED stuff there, but in the Internet age, QED is a punchline marker.

Red on Red

Posted in News on December 22nd, 2012 by Brian

Talk radio host Dana Loesch files suit in St. Louis against Breitbart.com:

Conservative talk radio host and commentator Dana Loesch sued the owner of the conservative website Breitbart.com Friday, claiming that although her relationship with the news and opinion aggregating website had gone “tragically awry,” Breibart.cοm LLC refused to let her work for the company or anyone else, forcing her into “indentured servitude in limbo.”

I wonder what’s up with that?

Ding Dongs On Ice

Posted in News on November 29th, 2012 by Brian

Let’s kill two birds with one stone, shall we?

Problem: The continuing NHL labor dispute.

Problem: Hostess Brands, Inc., liquidating over a labor dispute.

Solution: Open the NHL with replacement players taken from the bakeries.

America, you’re welcome.

(First link seen via Wombat over at The Other McCain.)

Just In Case

Posted in News on October 12th, 2012 by Brian

House-Size Asteroid Comes Closer to Earth Than the Moon Friday:

A newfound asteroid the size of a house will fly closer to Earth than the moon on Friday (Oct. 12), but poses no danger of impacting our planet, NASA says.

I’d like to believe NASA here, but they’ve cut the collision detection slide rule budget for more outreach efforts.

As a precaution, I’ve put a Mok and a sorceress on speed dial.

UPDATE Thanks for the mention, Ms. X. and for the link, Ms. K. Hey, readers, did you know Ms. X. once said my novel John Donnelly’s Gold was “quite an adventure” and “a satisfying story”? Really. You can own it on Kindle for 99 cents, in trade paperback, or for your Apple devices.

Appealing to the Ronbots

Posted in News on October 8th, 2012 by Brian

An email from the Romney campaign has a subject line that might appeal to the followers of a certain cranky Texas congressman:

Meet Dad or Paul

I suspect though the text of the message made clear, though, that you’d meet not Ron Paul but Paul Ryan.

I don’t think the Ron Paul fans would be fooled after all.

The Manatee Wants to Press Charges

Posted in News on October 4th, 2012 by Brian

I hope the manatee will testify in this case:

The woman wanted by police for harassing and riding on a manatee at Fort DeSoto Park has turned herself in.

Why is riding a manatee illegal?

Gutierrez told deputies she’s new to the area and didn’t realize it was against the law to touch or harass the creature.

According to the Florida Manatee Sanctuary Act, “It is unlawful for any person at any time, by any means, or in any manner, intentionally or negligently to annoy, molest, harass, or disturb or attempt to molest, harass, or disturb any Manatee.”

Does riding a manatee automatically count as annoying, molesting, harassing, or disturbing (or trying to do so)? You’d have to ask the manatee.

Or, as the authorities have done, just assume the answer is yes. Because of the mind-meld, I guess.

You Airplane Security, Summarized

Posted in News on September 29th, 2012 by Brian

You: You get to stand in line, take off your shoes, go through a backscatter machine or whatnot, get a free underpants massage, answer silly questions, listen to a loop of monotonous warnings over the PA, and so on.

Your cat? Not so much.

The story of Bob-Bob the cat received national attention last week after he snuck into Maze’s suitcase, made it through screening at Port Columbus International Airport and was loaded into an airplane for a flight to Orlando.

. . .

Mike Groleau, who handled the bags for the group, said he thought he saw the suitcase wiggle, but went ahead and loaded it along with the other bags.

Your bags can wiggle, and that’s all right with airport employees who’ve got other things to do, other planes to load and unload, little cart trains to careen around the tarmac, and whatnot.

Grenade Fishing: You’re Doing It Wrong

Posted in News on September 12th, 2012 by Brian

You’re not actually supposed to reel in the grenade:

Matt Tucker caught a couple of bass at Fellows Lake this morning — and fished out a live hand grenade as well.

Tucker, a Springfield firefighter, said he was casting a lure near the highway bridge on the east side of the lake, when he hooked a tangle of line on the bottom.

He noticed an old sock near his lure and pulled the odd bit of trash out of the lake.

Inside the sock? A Vietnam-era pineapple hand grenade with the safety pin still intact.

Some people can’t even grenade fish right.

UPDATE: Welcome, Neatorama readers. You might have heard John Farrier call me “novelist Brian J. Noggle” because my comic IT Heist novel John Donnelly’s Gold is available in paperback, for the Kindle for 99 cents, and at the iTunes store for you iPad people.