Brian J.’s Recycler Tour, Stadium Date

From this day in 2014:

I briefly considered raising meet goats, but the track shoe budget looked exorbitant.

That would have been before my school sports dad days. Now that my boys are both in high school, it’s strictly band dad. Although I do go to the high school football games where they march.

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The Clues in the Songs

One does not have to go all The Da Vinci Code or National Treasure to find clues that will lead to some treasure. I have discovered some sort of conspiracy or puzzle in popular music across the generations.

So a recent (2019) song from Four80East, “Cinco Cinco Seis” has played a bunch on WSIE and DirecTV’s smooth jazz station many, many times:

In it, they repeat like an electro-jazz numbers station, “Uno dos tres quatro cinco cinco seis.”

Yesterday, on the radio, I heard “Pretty Fly (For a White Guy)”, the 1998 hit from The Offspring, and it, too, says that number:

1-2-3-4-5-5-6. What does it mean? Some people might say it’s counting to get the beat before starting music, but the music has already started.

It’s coordinates. Or something.

Does the number 480 and the direction East mean anything?

The beginning of “Pretty Fly (For a White Guy” samples the beginning of 1983’s “Rock of Ages” by Def Leppard:

According to the official account (if you can believe the “official” story), this made up bit of German-sounding language was, again, designed to be the count for the music to begin–in this case, the music does begin after the words.

But are the words a pass phrase? An indicator that one must start at some point in Germany (a rock?) and go east 480…. something? Is 1234556 the password, proving that the people who have hidden vast treasure in Germany or Eastern Europe were as bad at passwords as people on the Internet?

The clues came out in 1983, 1998, and 2019. Will the next clue come out in a little over 20 years? I cannot wait that long.

If anyone needs me, I will be in a room in the basement, posting photos and text and drawing arrows between them until I solve this mystery.

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Brian J.’s Recycler Tour Enters The Octagon

From this date in 2015:

Although it’s not explicitly stated, apparently robotic exoskeletons are not allowed in martial arts sparring, either.

Which is unfortunate, as Asian tech-arms dealers have notoriously restrictive return policies.

Jeez, I have been studying martial arts for a long time, but not frequently enough to master them.

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Brian J.’s Recycler Tour, War College Edition

From this date in 2010:

Brian J. Noggle wargamed, using MegaBloks, Happy Meal toys, and various wheeled toys, a regional conflict in the Middle East that erupted when Israel stopped an “aid convoy” including Iranian naval vessels. It wasn’t going too bad for Israel until Russia, depicted by a talking Shrek riding on a cast iron tractor, offered direct military aid to Iran to further encircle Afghanistan with its military forces.

I am pretty sure I still have all the action figures and Happy Meal toys, but not the MegaBloks, in unsorted boxes in the garage. I should get them out and get to my predicting, as I could probably do no worse than the powers that pretend in Washington, D.C.

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Brian J.’s Recycler Tour Visits Arkham

From 2018:

I’ve just learned to play a miskatonic scale on my guitar.

Now, what am I to do with all these chthonians I’ve drawn from below?

Yeah, I have not picked up that guitar in a while. I learned a few chords, but I was not very good at changing cords in time as I still had to look at the frets to place my fingers.

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A New George Carlin Joke, But From A Dream

From a dream I had last night:

HOW TO MAKE THE MAN IN THE SUIT UNCOMFORTABLE IN THE RESTROOM: Narrate your urination.

I said this in my best George Carlin imitation in my dream. I was in a school bathroom. A repairman was working on the urinals, so I stepped into one of the stalls, and as I was doing so, a man in a suit came in. So I said this from the stall. And I noticed as I was starting to urinate that there were books in the toilet. So I stopped, and I took the books out of the toilet, and eventually there were 43. I mentioned it to some teachers, presumably after zipping up, but transitions are a little smoother in dreams, and they said it was one student’s book order, and sometimes the kids are afraid of books.

finis

I don’t it’s based off of yesterday’s post or I just had to go to the bathroom (I awakened, and did).

But, c’mon, you can hear that in George Carlin’s delivery, can’t you?

Maybe I should include a TMI category on the blog.

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Earworm Adjacency

If you can say the name of this flavor without using Tone Lōc’s diction, you’re a better man than I am, Charlie Brown.

Frothy Capp-uccino.

Here, let me help stick it in your head.

There. Now you won’t. Although whether you ever see Gevalia Frothy Cappuccino in the wild is chancy at best.

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Ackshually….

I saw this, what, tweet? at Knuckledraggin:

And I had to correct the Internet, again.

  • The Geo Metro was first available in 1989.
  • By the middle 1980s, the 8-Track player was no longer the thing in cars. All of my cars from the era had cassette players.
  • I was finta say that “Smooth Jazz” is a recent coinage for what we called “easy listening” in the 1980s, but I might be anachronistic here myself as I only heard the term applied to a radio station in St. Louis in the early part of this century. Wikipedia and All Music put its origins earlier, but I’m not sure if the term was applied and I just didn’t know it. Although the All Music entry looks like a snapshot of my record shelves.
  • Although I did not have a Geo Metro (I did, however, have a Geo Storm for a couple of years), I did have a 1984 Mustang with a balky carb that was hard to start, especially in the cold (and it was only my daily driver from like January to May in 1997). My friend Walter, who that spring painted my face up for Mardi Gras, said, “Give it seven and pray to Heaven.” Because I would pump the gas roughly seven times to prime it; any fewer would be too little, and any more might flood it.

Sorry, I think we wandered a bit from correcting the Internet into personal reminiscences. But that is the way of the blog, ainna?

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Brian J.’s Recycler Tour, Arkham Edition

From this date in 2010:

Brian J. Noggle is so vain, he thinks this song is about him and is sending him coded messages from The Messiah Team detailing the secret conspiracy of grocery store bread vendors against him. So maybe “vain” isn’t the operative word.

Facebook, and Twitter, used to be good for a quip, before the algorithms got too sophisticated and stopped showing them to people I know.

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The Perfect Easter Movie

Ladies and gentlemen, we at MfBJN have conclusively proven that Lethal Weapon is a Christmas movie, and we have admitted that Lethal Weapon 2 is not a Christmas movie. But hear me now and believe me later:

Lethal Weapon 2 is an Easter movie.

Now, it is not set during the Easter season that I can tell; however, review the following:’

  • Martin Riggs is tortured;
  • Riggs carries the means of his execution to the place of execution;
  • Riggs “dies”;
  • He descends to a watery grave;
  • He rises again;
  • In his second coming, he brings justice and retribution to the wicked.

You see: It was The Passion of the Christ before Gibson had enough clout to make the movie he really wanted to make.

Follow me for more insight into how the Lethal Weapon movies all deal with important events on the church calendar, and how Bird on a Wire is a documentary.

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Brian J.’s Recycler Tour Goes Round and Round

Several funny things posted on this day in history.

March 15, 2014:

Trivia fact: In the song “Norwegian Pie”, Don McLean drives his Ford to the fjord.

March 15, 2012:

Brian J. Noggle points out that, in the Marvel Universe, they would only be the Teenage Ninja Turtles since their powers came from alteration, not birth.

March 15, 2011:

Brian J. Noggle expects that, with all the inflation, the Mötley Crüe song will have to be covered as “Girls, Girls, Girls, Girls”.

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